So, the royal wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle has come and gone, and you are left to dream of when your day will come.

While you dream of the wedding gown, cake, bridal train and the rest, have you thought of how life will be in the marriage?

Many times, you are going through pre-wedding counselling, they tell you “husband love your wife, wife submit to your husband”.

Valid advice, but there are some facts about the essence of marriage that these words do not capture and for some reasons, many do not like to emphasize.

Every time there is talk about marriage and its challenges, the focus is usually on events of the moment and compatibility issues.

But in the real sense of it, whose loss is it when you do not know what you should know?

Do not fall for some of these societal beliefs, they are selfish!

1. That man needs you

First, marriage is not a favour to you as a woman.

According to the holy books whose teachings majority of us follow, God created man and saw that he was lonely and then he made woman.

The plain meaning is that men are not wired to live without women.

Men can twist this point to mean the creation of women is an after-thought but if you know your worth as a woman you will not fall for such selfish view.

Women were created for men and not men for women.

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2. Marriage is for companionship first

Yes, it is good to have kids as God instructed in Genesis 1:28, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it...”,

But we need to constantly remind ourselves that children are meant to someday find their way and all that will be left is the friendship you build as a couple.

After all, God created woman to be the man’s companion. Your Bible confirmed it is Genesis 2:18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

If kids do not arrive in time, focus on the love – essence of being with your partner.

3. Career success is big deal

If marriage is a burden to your career and economic stability, then there is a problem.

The continuation of that same passage, Genesis 1:29: “Then God said, ‘Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you’”.

Your career or business is your farm and the plants are the skills you must constantly nurture to yield fruits for you to live a good life.

There will be tough times just as farmers have tough seasons but ultimately, a true farmer never abandons his farm.

In short, career success or financial comfort is not a bonus but the main reward.

4. Sex is king

What else can I say? Sex is a powerful seal on all the things you feel for each other.

Sex to marriage is what petrol is to a vehicle. Even the so-called procreation cannot happen without sex.

If anyone tells you sex is secondary and you believe them, I wish you luck.

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